Don’t be the Dead Girl!
Breakfast: Diet shake
Lunch: chicken breast tenderloin, steamed corn, field greens
Snack: Diet shake
Dinner: tea, fish cakes, sorbet
41 minutes on treadmill
Sweatin’ to: Fatboy Slim, The Corrs, 2Pac, REM, PM Dawn, Madonna, JT
Time flies by so quickly these days and if you can’t keep up with it, you’ll get left behind real fast. Left behind to scrape your way back. The worst thing is to fall in a hole and spend a ton of time trying to climb out. Remember The Ring? It’s like being in that dark well with the dead girl and you see the tiny glimmer of light at the top and you try to climb out…and right when you get to the top, the dead girl grabs your dumb ass and you fall right back to the bottom. Creepy. Sickening. Depressing. And when you find yourself at the bottom of the well again with the Dead Girl, it’s so tempting to say to yourself, “Fine, I’ll just stay here with you, Dead Girl, cuz I’m sick of climbing and you’re just gonna pull my dumb ass back down witcha anyway to share in your misery, so why bother trying to climb out again?!”
So all of you who are acting like “Dead Girls” right now, wake up! Get off your dumb asses and instead of trying to pull others down to the bottom of the well with you, start climbing with them! Stop sitting on your fat asses and do something! Do something now! Do something now to improve your situation! Do something now to improve your life! Cuz no one wants to be in the well with you! And when you finally climb out, I guarantee you there will be many to welcome you with open arms and give you the respect you deserve for beating the misery well! But the legs can’t climb when the ass is glued to the couch! If you need help, ask for it! Ask your friends! Ask your family! Ask for a professional’s advice! But get movin’!
Uncle Joe and my two cousins, Barbara and Nicole, are comin’ tonight for the weekend. They want to “gamble” with me. Not sure if they know what they’re getting themselves into…lol. Barbara also wants to go to a club and Anna told me she’ll get me a table wherever I want. BUT…I’m not a clubber and although I’ve been to a couple in SF and Singapore, I have yet to step into a nightclub here in Vegas. Just not interested in the loud music and beautiful people that are trying to mack on each other, slip drugs into their drinks, and who knows what next as the night where’s on. Oh my goodness! Too fake and pretentious for me. However, I wouldn’t mind people-watching to see these folks make fools of themselves. I can use a good laugh anytime. So, we’ll see what happens this weekend.
I was runnin’ on the treadmill this morn and noticed a difference about the people at the gym lately. They’re all old and fat! Big props to the old and fat people that are at the gym and not perching their dumb asses on the couch! They’re making sure to stay far away from the Dead Girl and her well! I’m talking old people too…like 60+! White hair, lotsa wrinkles, cheesy workout clothes! Now this is “Sweatin’ to the Oldies” at its finest! What an inspiration for me! I have no excuses to miss a day at the gym now! There was one old lady right in front of me on the elliptical and when she got off, she was hunching over. Not cuz she was dog tired, but that’s how she is now! Hunched over but boy was she workin’ that elliptical like she was 25! Geez! When she turned toward me, I saw all this sweat on her face! Wow! You go grandma! Then I saw an old Asian dude doing crunches on one of the machines. Looked like he was in so much pain but he was on a mission, man! He looked like he was ready to kill somebody! He was so determined to leave the Dead Girl at the bottom of the well. In fact, he kicked the Dead Girl’s ass first before climbing his way out of her well! Asian guy had to be the leader of some triad or something cuz he was fierce! I bet he has a hot date tonight with grandma and he’s gonna show off his six pack!
Today was Oprah’s last episode of her Best Life series and the last topic was Sex 101. I was blushing the whole time watching this…oh my goodness! I didn’t know that there are “foreplay maps” out there?! Hmm, we’re talkin’ about finding a whole new kind of buried treasure! Sheeeet!
Other than that, I ran some errands, did laundry, and tidied up my lil condo. Went to Verizon too and they have so many phones to choose from. Trying to find something simple and easy to use. No frills. Just good reception, please. Will go back in the morn and get my new phone. Probably will hit the Strip tonight with the rellies and some pals and hopefully win some grocery money for this weekend. Can’t believe the weekend’s already here again. Like I said, time flies but I promise y’all I’m gonna stay far away from the Dead Girl.

Leave a Reply